Special Ops Paintball: funniest thing a noob has said to you? - Special Ops Paintball

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funniest thing a noob has said to you? lulz... Rate Topic: ***** 2 Votes

#646 User is offline   FORKAST 

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Posted 18 August 2010 - 10:11 PM

Kids at a local indoor were checking out my stuff. I have an A5 with a red dot which caught a lot of attention. .. One of the kids grabbed the mouthpiece of my camelback with his finger and thumb and said, "what's this?" I promptly told him it's my water as he quickly let go and walked away embarrased. Dang kids!
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#647 User is offline   laxkid101 

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 05:51 PM

that was quite a necropost...

My friend (well not really, just some kid I know) who was trying to impress me said he had a gun that shot at half a mile accurately, had a four finger trigger, and fired 250 bps at 750 fps. I asked him what kind of gun it was and he said an Ion :D
Ions: Great guns, until they break...

I'm 13 and I pay for my own equipment!

Part time paintballer, part time laxer.
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#648 User is offline   stinkfingr 

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 06:37 PM

a dude who is a good friend of mine that i introduced to the sport, once told me he was going to blaze a path across the middle of the field, charge the fort, and take no prisoners ... he then asked me if i would be his wingman ... i started laughing, and asked him if he intended to shoot the other team or ask them out for a date ...

he has since gotten to be quite the player, and i still use that line on him occasionally when he gets full of himself, and we'll share a pretty good laugh .. then he'll usually punch me... friends, cant live with em, cant live without em ... :P
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#649 User is offline   Down Range Pain 

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 08:40 PM

oh wait...ur on my team huh?

lol just play on the flank with that lil pump gun kid

why would u want to walk the field? theres no one there

did u get lost (i did, in the woods, on the feild i didnt walk before hand)
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#650 User is offline   Down Range Pain 

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 09:48 PM

View PostAaronC, on 13 May 2008 - 06:44 AM, said:

all day this little kid was following me around and in awe of my Etek. Finally near the end of the day I gave it to him to use and just before he hit the field he yelled out "finally I get to use full auto!" and when I told him it was just in semi mode (how I like it) his face just fell and I thought he was going to cry.


aww...thts kinda sad :(
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#651 User is offline   Iron__Man 

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 10:41 PM

so i got a new one finally. a week ago i got a friend interested in playing. so i help him score a 98c w/ flatline and a shake n bake hopper for 25 bucks. (i know, i'm awesome). so we get home and im ready to tear it down and clean it. as it was full of goop, and all kinds of nasty. he picks up the barrel, looks at me, and says, "man... you bought a broken pice of crap... this barrel's hella bent dude!". i of course reply with " well, until you learn to shoot straight we'll have to use the training wheels won't we?" he looked at me and we both had a good laugh, after i explained how a flatline works. he still doesnt believe me, but he got a c02 tank and i'm taking him to the field in a week or two to show him what i mean when i say long range.. you has it.
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#652 User is offline   Boazdexter 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 02:32 AM

hello
this is Dexter and what funniest thing a noob has said ?

i want to know about it




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#653 User is offline   stinkfingr 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 06:12 AM

its the dreaded dexterspam machine ....

i havent seen random spam on here for awhile ...DOH...this spam should have been in the random thread ....lol :P
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#654 User is offline   shadow_772 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 07:22 AM

View Postklaatu, on 21 August 2010 - 07:12 AM, said:

its the dreaded dexterspam machine ....

i havent seen random spam on here for awhile ...DOH...this spam should have been in the random thread ....lol :P

lol I didn't catch that at first.. Took me a minute.
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#655 User is offline   Iron__Man 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 01:16 PM

toy with ze spammer then ban him. jess..lull him into false sense of security... zen detroy him. zis....dexter.

This post has been edited by Iron__Man: 21 August 2010 - 01:17 PM

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#656 User is offline   mike7822 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 07:06 PM

Rental: Is that a Mini
Me: YOU DUN GOOF'D ITS A GEO LOLOLOLOLOLOL. Note: I did infact say L-O-L-O-L

Yep livin the life












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This post has been edited by mike7822: 21 August 2010 - 07:08 PM

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#657 User is offline   scooby doo 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 08:26 PM

(I fill up co2 tanks)

as we get to the field someone says to me:

"oh crap! I forgot to have you fill up these for me!"
( then pulls out a box of 12grams) :rolleyes:

This post has been edited by scooby doo: 21 August 2010 - 08:36 PM

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#658 User is offline   The Bear 

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 09:11 PM

A new (assuming new, not certain of his noob status but I think the story speaks for itself) player came to our field for the first time with a Spyder something-or-other (remember, its a Spyder) and asked the manager to help him get it working. After some basic cleaning, lubing, and a couple of seals the manager took him out to the chrony station and put some paint thru it and everything was looking good. He hands it to the player and says "Your all set." to which the player replies great, I was afraid you might not getting it working and it cost me five hundred bucks! (He had bought it used...)
To the managers credit he managed to say nothing, keep a straight face until he rejoined us and was well away from the player before we all had a good laugh of disbelief. If only he were joking!

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#659 User is offline   Eskimo 

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Posted 23 August 2010 - 02:02 PM

him: "Aww man, you know nobody plays with Ions with Tactical bodys anymore dont you?"

Me: Yes, I just havnt gotten around to buying a new marker lately ( Its not a Ion. its Not a Ion. Its not a Ion, its a Tac-One. its a Automag. Its Not a Ion. Its Not a Ion)


Him: Well what marker do you plan on buying?

Me: I dont. ( he still thinks its a Ion..)

Him: Your Ion is going to break down, they always do

Me:........ ITS NOT A ION!!!!!!!!!

This post has been edited by Eskimo: 23 August 2010 - 02:03 PM

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#660 User is offline   Pirate 

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Posted 23 August 2010 - 02:34 PM

Come on Eskimo, you know EVERYTHING is actually an Ion.

Me: *pulls Marq6 out of my marker case*
Kid 1: Dude! Where did you get a purple Ion?!?
Me: It's not an Ion, it's actually...
Kid 2: *interrupting, to Kid 1* You idiot, that's clearly a Shocker. *to me* Do you play a lot of tournaments?
Me: It's not a Shocker, and no, I haven't played a tournament in a year and a half. I mostly play scenarios.
Both Kids: They let you use that in scenarios?

-another instance-
Me: *slides in to big bunker with two other kids*
Kid A: Whoa, you're that pro player with the really cool Ion I heard someone talking about!
Me: Amm... what?
Kid A: Yeah, Mike Patton or something, right? (NOTE: I do have a Mike Paxson Ironman jersey that Poppa Bear gave me. I used to wear it to the field sometimes)
Me: Oh, Mike Paxson. No, I just have one of his jerseys.
Kid B: How did you get his jersey if you aren't him?
Me: Do you have a LeBron James jersey?
Kid B: Yeah.
Me: HOLY CRAP I'M PLAYING PAINTBALL WITH LEBRON JAMES! *I then got up and ran to a different bunker*

And finally... (I'm saying Guy here, because they were about my age. Definitely in college)
Me: *takes my Marq out, puts on purple under armor, Destiny jersey, and purple mask*
Guy: Dude, why are you wearing purple? That's a girls color.
Me: Says who? Last I checked, Purple was the color of Royalty.
Guy: Well, only girls wear purple.
Me: Actually, I got this jersey and marker from girls.
*about this time, two female friends of mine show up. They also have purple shirts, masks, and markers from when we had a 3-man team "Menage a trois"*
Guys Friend: See dude, those two chicks are wearing purple. So now what you got to say?
Me: So they are. *the girls walk up on either side of me and I put my arms around their shoulders* Guess the only thing to say is, "Hail to the King, Baby."
*we walk off to go register*

I might have to call them up and see if they're still playing...

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